I once knitted a scarf for a Romanian orphan that, whilst packaged in cardboard and wrapped tightly in plastic wrap, looked sensational… but once unwrapped it curled in on itself to resemble a long blue snake. I should have stuck a couple of googly eyes on it so the poor little kid thought it was a toy as well.
I still fall into the trap of buying yarn. Unfortunately, buying yarn is not the same as knitting yarn.
I do admire people who can knit. Even the (possibly slightly) mental ones that knit bizarre stuff. That’s fine with me. Bizarro is right up my alley.
Ballsack, Cafe Press
Knit your own whatever, just Google the title you like.
Lots of places have them . I know. LOTS.